Pull up a chair and let’s get real about our prayer lives. If you are anything like me, you consistently find yourself thinking, “I wish my prayer life was much more vibrant.” Sound familiar? It’s not that we are ill-informed of Scripture’s clear call to pray (Mt 6:5-15; Eph 6:18; 1 Thess 5:17; Jude 20). It’s not that we willfully fail to appreciate Jesus’ modeling of prayer for us (Mt 14:23; 26:36-44; Heb 4:7). It’s not even that we are without promise of what prayer, in God’s hands, accomplishes (Jas 5:16).
What is it, then, that functions as a barrier between us and a meaningful and enjoyable prayer life? Let me offer one answer: substance.
If we take honest inventory of our prayer lives, what do we pray most about? What is the language surrounding such requests? Are our prayers informed more by self-interests (“Lord, please give me…” and self-language (“I,” “me,” or “my”) or the copious expressions and priorities of Scripture? This makes all the difference in the substance of our prayers. In the words of Matthew Henry, “If the heart be full of its good matter; it may make the tongue as the pen of a ready writer.”1 It’s not that Scripture forbids praying for self in terms of both general desires and absolute needs. It’s a matter of Scripture informing the substance and direction of our prayers. This, in turn, moves us from the shallow end of “heart matter” to swimming in oceans full of wonder in what matters most to the Lord. Prayer is not meant to be an aimless activity; rather, it’s an occasion for deeper communion with the Father. The language of Scripture does wonders to mold our hearts to a posture ready to commune with the Lord in ways that are beneficial to our souls and profoundly God-centric.
Let’s think for a moment about the direction of our prayers. Scripture not only provides substance for our prayers, but the very substance itself helps us establish parameters for praying. This, in turn, helps ensure our minds and hearts abstain from wondering off into oblivion. Quite simply, the Scriptures educate us on who, what, when, where, why, and how to pray. Consider the following, non-exhaustive points:
Who do I pray for?
1. Pray for those who persecute you. (Mt 5:44)
2. Pray for those heralding the gospel near and far under difficult circumstances. (2 Thess 3:1-2)
3. Pray for those in the faith and are growing in living for God. (2 Thess 1:11)
4. Pray for all people, namely those in positions of authority. (1 Tim 2:1-4)
5. Pray for self. (Psalm 4:1)
What do I pray for?
1. Pray for anything that is linked to Kingdom service and advancement. (Acts 1:24-26; 6:6; 13:3; 14:23; 20:36; 21:5; 1 Thess 5:25; Mt 6:10)
2. Pray for God’s name to revered in all circumstances by all people. (Mt 6:9)
3. For others and self, pray against temptation. (Mt 26:41)
4. For others and self, pray for needs. (Mt 6:8; Jn 14:13; 1 Jn 5:14-15)
Note: Our supreme need is not to have for the benefit of self; our greatest need, rather, is to have what we need to glorify the Father in the Son. Anything we are granted above a need is a generous gift from God who gives abundantly out of His good pleasure.
5. For others and self, pray in times of distress/suffering. (Jas 5:13; Acts 16:16-40)
6. For others and self, pray for wisdom in all circumstances. (Jas 1:5-8)
7. For others and self, pray for the love of the saints to mature and abound. (Phil 1:9)
8. For others and self, pray for increased understanding of God’s will. (Col 1:9; Mt 6:10)
When and where do I pray?
The biblical underpinning for answering this question is found in Hebrews 4:16: Let us then with confidence draw near to the throne of grace, that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need (emphasis added). When are we in need of God’s help? Every second of the day! Perhaps this is why we are wisely commanded to pray without ceasing (1 Thess 5:17) and to continue steadfastly in prayer (Col 4:2). We see this reality played out all over Scripture. Saul found himself in need after encountering Jesus on the road to Damascus (Acts 9:11). Peter turns to the Lord in prayer when healing a young disciple in Joppa (Acts 9:40). One day at noon, Peter cries out to the Father (Acts 10:9). On another day, Cornelius bows his heart in prayer around 3pm (Acts 10:30). In a state of grief, Jesus labors in prayer in the Garden of Gethsemane (Mt 26:36-46). Yet with these episodes of “without ceasing prayer” in mind, we also see Scripture warranting more formal times of prayer. This most notably was modeled by Jesus Himself (Mt 14:23). The Son knew perfectly His inability to do anything without the Father’s assistance (Jn 5:19), so we see Jesus as a man of prayer throughout the days of His earthly ministry (Heb 4:7). When do we pray? We must be those who pray continually, always dependent upon the Father for grace to live life in a manner pleasing to Him (Ps 62:8). We must also set aside time to commune deeply with the Father (Mt 6:6).
Why do I pray?
Some might question the necessity of prayer, given the Father knows exactly what we need before we ask (Mt 6:8). However, it’s actually because the Father knows what we need that we come boldly to Him! We go to Him because He has the grace we need. All answers flow from His gracious hand. God has designed prayer to help us genuinely grasp our dependence upon Him for all things (Acts 17:28). It is a gift that our prayers, in His hands, accomplish great things (Jas 5:16). And so God commands we pray, in part, for our increased faith—namely to see clearly our need of what only He can accomplish for the good of His people and the renown of His name.
How do I pray?
By God’s grace, we must strive to pray…
1. …without hypocrisy (Mt 6:5).
2. …without empty phrases (Mt 6:7).
3. …with dependence upon the Spirit (Eph 6:18; Rom 8:26-27; Jude 20).
4. …without anger or quarreling (1 Tim 2:8).
5. …without selfishness (Jas 4:3).
6. …with an earnest desire to be holy (Ps 139:23-24).
7. …alone and with others (Mt 6:6; Acts 2:42; 12:12).
These parameters help protect the direction of our praying, while also giving the very substance we need for meaningful prayers. All we do is reverently insert names and circumstances, while exercising variety and spontaneity. But we must see that prayer is not strictly formulaic; it is graciously relational. Just like with anyone whose company we constantly enjoy and benefit from, even more so should we press into our fellowship with the One who delivered us from the domain of darkness (Col 1:13) . It is to Him we bring the specifics our lives and the lives of those we fellowship with as they relate to purposes in His Kingdom.
As our prayers are protected by the parameters provided in Scripture, we will also come to appreciate and utilize the very language of Scripture. In utilizing the language of Scripture, our prayers become invigorated and shaped by God’s thoughts. For example, consider how drenched Paul’s prayer for the Ephesian church is in the doctrines of God (Eph 1:15-23). Paul’s prayer life (yes, inspired by the Holy Spirit) was enveloped by God’s thoughts. Do you realize, though, that the quality of Paul’s prayer life can be the quality of our prayer lives? The same God who gave Paul the ability to pray doctrinally-rich prayers which align with Kingdom priorities is the same God who stands ready to do the same for us. We simply need to get busy about praying God’s thoughts—praying Scripture—that we might more fully know Him and pray for the things that matter most to Him. Both Testaments give us rich prayer language. From the 4 named prayers in the Psalms (17, 86, 90, 102) to the many prayers of David (Ps 72:20) to the elaborate prayers of Paul, there is no shortage of language to use in working toward a deeper prayer life and greater appreciation for the gift of prayer.
In a forthcoming post, we will use the parameters above to learn how to pray more meaningfully Psalm 17. Stay tuned!
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1. Matthew Henry, A Method for Prayer: Freedom in the Face of God (Ross-shire: Christian Focus Publications Ltd, 1994), 16.