In an earlier blog post, Pastor John wrote how believers can more effectively lean into their relationships with those who have special needs, and he offered helpful suggestions about what to say and what not to say in everyday conversations. I want to share my experience and offer encouragement to those who are considering taking the additional step of adopting a child with special needs. Several years ago, my wife and I were called to adopt a child into our family. We were convicted by Scripture that emphasized God’s compassion and love for children who were abandoned, abused, and neglected.
Matthew 19:14 "but Jesus said, “Let the little children come to me and do not hinder them, for to such belongs the kingdom of heaven.”
It seemed like a daunting task to add another child to our family but James 1:27 offered additional encouragement, “Religion that is pure and undefiled before God the Father is this: to visit orphans and widows in their affliction, and to keep oneself unstained from the world.”
If adoption was one way to imitate Christ and follow the Lord, God would surely provide the strength and wisdom during the adoption process, as well as when we would eventually bring our child home. Since we serve a God who reigns over the whole world, we decided not to limit our adoption to the United States. We were initially unaware of the large number of children awaiting adoption who have special needs when we started the journey of international adoption. Many Christians may have in mind that international adoption largely consists of adopting girls who were abandoned in China because of the government’s one-child policy. At the turn of this century, that may have been the case when thousands of girls were adopted every year from China. Today, however, China has eliminated the one-child policy and almost every child who is adopted there has special needs. In fact, international adoption today predominantly involves children with special needs and in some countries is limited to children with special needs.
As part of the adoption paperwork, we were required to fill-out the most intimidating form I had ever seen. We were asked to indicate which physical and mental challenges our family was willing to accommodate. One of the checkboxes was for visual impairment or blindness. While answering these questions is a deeply personal decision, several verses offer encouragement and wisdom in navigating this process. In response to Moses’ objection to God about his abilities, Exodus 4:11 records
“The LORD said to him, "Who gave man his mouth? Who makes him deaf or mute? Who gives him sight or makes him blind? Is it not I, the LORD?”
Just as Moses was reminded that God is in control and that He is the author of all creation, we would do well to remember that God is the one who created every child to be an image bearer. No child is excluded from the gift of God’s creation. In John chapter 9, we read the story about how Jesus came upon a man who was blind from birth. His disciples asked him whether his blindness was caused by his sin or by his parents' sin. John 9:3 records “Jesus answered, neither hath this man sinned, nor his parents: but that the works of God should be made manifest in him.”
Every physical and mental condition is not only known in advance by God, the very condition itself is part of God’s plan. Our youngest son Luke, whom we adopted from Colombia, was born with optic nerve hypoplasia. As a result, he has significant visual impairment and requires assistance to learn how to navigate the world in ways other children do not. While I am anxiously awaiting to see God’s plan unfold in his life, I take comfort in Jesus’ parable of the wedding feast in Luke 12:12-14 in which He said
“When you give a luncheon or dinner, do not invite your friends, your brothers or relatives, or your rich neighbors; if you do, they may invite you back and so you will be repaid. But when you give a banquet, invite the poor, the crippled, the lame, the blind, and you will be blessed. Although they cannot repay you, you will be repaid at the resurrection of the righteous."
Just as God has a special compassion for the orphaned, He also loves and cares for those with special needs. As a church, we are called to invite those with physical and mental challenges to fully participate in the worship of God. At times it might be difficult to know what to say or how to respond in certain situations, but that should not deter us from experiencing the joy and blessing from worshiping with all of God’s people who are created in His image. We are a church that encourages a culture of adoption as a witness to the Gospel, therefore we must also welcome, support, and accommodate children and adults with special needs. If anyone is considering adopting a child, with or without special needs, I would be happy to talk more about the process and pray for you.
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